The Advanced Soul

Regrets

I would much rather have regrets about not doing what people said, than regretting not doing what my heart led me to and wondering what life had been like if I’d just been myself. - Brittany Renée

(1 votes, average: 5 out of 5)

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Greg Hankerson Happiness, Relationships, Enlightenment 2 Comments »
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Justify Behavior, Justifying Actions

One thing I tend to do is justify people’s actions. I can see why they did what they did. People are trained to do things as they grow up. I was trained to justify. For instance, if somebody commits a crime, I imagine how they got to the place that they are and build an understanding of it. A computer does what it does because it was programmed by somebody. People are programmed by people like parents, friends, teachers, the media, etc. So the man that beats his wife, well he saw daddy do that and is just imitating behavior. And I don’t see this as right or wrong, it’s just what is. It’s the cycle of life. Some call me crazy for thinking this way, but it serves me.

But my justifying behavior has caused some friction in my relationships. Somebody tells me what somebody did or said to them and how it hurts them. And I tend to justify what happened by saying that they’d done the same thing in another situation and how can you be upset when they’d done it too? Isn’t that hypocritical? Well yes, but it doesn’t help the situation to bring it up. Some people can handle that info, but most can’t. One reason is it makes them think I am siding with the other person they are feuding with, I am taking their side. I am not really being supportive in a critical situation either. Over time people will end up resenting me if I continue to do this.

So this is the beginning of a new rule for me. When somebody close to me is having a tough time with somebody else, the best thing I can do is listen and not judge. And to give them comfort and be there for them. When the moment is heated, just listen and give comfort. This is going to be difficult for me because I am used to doing this all the time. But I am committed to change, and it’ll happen.

(4 votes, average: 4 out of 5)

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Greg Hankerson Happiness 4 Comments »
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